2009-08-09
Ephesians - Husbands and Wives 2
Steve Lane

A. Review/Introduction
Three-legged race -- and we are to move together toward that goal
The "profound fusion of two lives into one, shared life together..." ~Otlund
But something happened to make relationships and working together very difficult. Sin
James 4: 1 - 3, James 3: 13 - 18 - Go back to foundational principles.
What happened concerning the relationship of a husband and wife as a result of sin?
Genesis 3: 16 - 17, Genesis 4: 7 - Wrong kind of desire and wrong kind of ruling over.
Genesis 2: 18,20 - A far cry from humble male leadership and female help.
The man and the woman are equal in that they bear God's image equally.
In the partnership of two spiritually equal human beings, man and woman, the man bears the primary responsibility to lead the partnership in a God-glorifying direction.
1 Peter 5: 5
Adam was following instead of leading. Eve was usurping.
Love and respect, the powerful bit of counsel set within the grand picture of marriage.

B. Submission and Headship: Revival is Required

Ephesians 5: 21 - 24
Colossians 3: 18 - 19
Still getting the big picture of submission and headship.
There is a higher cause at stake than just having a happy marriage.
Titus 2: 4 - 5
Obedience must follow teaching. Knowing the way is not enough.
We first need whole-hearted acceptance (not theoretical) of the principles.

How can anyone submit with the attitude of Christ without death to self?
How can you say you love Christ if you can't show self-sacrificing (1 Corinthians 13) love?
If you do not have voluntary submission from the heart to your husband, you are not submitted to Christ.

We need to empower them for the purposes of God; not weigh them down.
Men: if you are not providing real and loving leadership, your wife is open to the attacks.
There are repercussions if you don't do your job.
Unity - very important principle to God from the beginning.

When men refuse to listen to their wives and they lead with arrogance, they get into trouble. The pre-fall concept of helpmate is critical to understanding the depth of headship and submission.
1 Corinthians 11: 8 - 9
If leadership is not costing you significant personal sacrifice.
Voluntary submission from the heart, or it doesn't work.
Women must believe that submission is their greatest ally to change a situation.
1 Peter 3: 1 - 3 Submission can be a scary thing, but so can Christlike headship.
We have been given a mission and roles in that mission.

What is the extent, though, of a wife's submission? Ephesians 5: 24
No one in authority is to lord it over another. (1 Peter 5: 3, 2 Corinthians 1: 24)

True personal revival is the only answer. A life fully given over to Christ and His purposes is what brings true joy and rightness to a marriage.